Employee of the Week.

Training at work is kind of like being a toddler. Everyone is very patient with you and when you do well they tell you how amazing you are. Well, that's what it was like for ME as a toddler. Back when everyone still thought I was cool.

But I've been on straight days this week which means I'm getting up before six AM. That's just wrong, where I come from. But they let me play with a walkie-talkie at work, and I'm fairly certain I've already discussed how much I enjoy that. I have, thus far, resisted the urge to give the maintenance men code names, the better to communicate over the walkie-talkie. It's been a very near thing.

I'm also like, in heat or something. Working where I do, I see a lot of people stream in and out of the building, but my favourite, by far, are all the contractors we have working there. Roof and electrical right now, and I must say, I've been molesting them with my eyes. And hands.

I told Susan I was going to sabotage the pants off the roofer. I'm so getting arrested.

Also? I nearly assaulted a SWAT-esque guy while I was down at the police station getting my background check done. It was hardly my fault. They shouldn't walk around with their full uniform, flak jacket and thigh holster on. That's just irresponsible. I can see how it could have gone badly, but in my head there was a lot more tearing off of my clothes and a lot less "ma'am, I'm going to have to cuff you if you don't cease and desist."