Army of Darkness

There are ten thousand cats roaming around in our neighbourhood and if Susan was less vigilant in her cat-forbidding ways I would have them all come live with me. Thus fulfilling my lifelong dream of living in a house that smells like urine and is covered in hair.

On the surface 10 000 cats in one house may sound like a bad idea. However, I don't think you've considered the fact that I could train them to become my Army of Darkness. No one would see it coming. Everyone loves cats, after all. Kittens would be the shock troops, the first wave, if you will. With their high pitched meows and soft fur no one would suspect them of nefarious deeds.

Some say that an Army of Darkness made up of humans would be more effective.

I stand by my decision.